My son bought me a GPS for my last birthday because they say I
get lost every now and then going hunting or fishing. I
keep that in a box under my tool bench with the Blue tooth [it's red]
phone I am supposed to use when I drive. I wore it once and was standing
in line at Barnes and Noble talking to my wife and everyone in the
nearest 50 yards was glaring at me. I had to take my hearing aid out to
use it, and I got a little loud.
I mean the GPS looked pretty smart on my dash board, but the lady
inside that gadget was the most annoying, rudest person I have run into in
a long time. Every 10 minutes, she would sarcastically say,
"Re-calc-u-lating." You would think that she could be nicer. It was like
she could barely tolerate me. She would let go with a deep sigh and then
tell me to make a U-turn at the next light. Then if I made a right turn
instead. Well, it was not a good relationship...
When I get really lost now, I call my wife and tell her the name of
the cross streets and while she is starting to develop the same tone as
Gypsy, the GPS lady, at least she loves me.
To be perfectly frank, I am still trying to learn how to use the
cordless phones in our house. We have had them for several years now, but I still
haven't figured out how I lose three phones all at once and have to run
around digging under chair cushions, checking bathrooms, and the dirty
laundry baskets when the phone rings.
The world is just getting too complex for me. They even mess me up
every time I go to the grocery store. You would think they could settle
on something themselves but this sudden "Paper or Plastic?" every time I
check out just knocks me for a loop. I bought some of those cloth
reusable bags to avoid looking confused, but I never remember to take
them with me.
Now I toss it back to them. When they ask me, "Paper or plastic?" I
just say, "Doesn't matter to me. I am bi-sacksual." Then it's their turn
to stare at me with a blank look. I was recently asked if I tweet. I
answered, No, but I do fart a lot."
emoBigsmile emoGeezer Jmax
get lost every now and then going hunting or fishing. I
keep that in a box under my tool bench with the Blue tooth [it's red]
phone I am supposed to use when I drive. I wore it once and was standing
in line at Barnes and Noble talking to my wife and everyone in the
nearest 50 yards was glaring at me. I had to take my hearing aid out to
use it, and I got a little loud.
I mean the GPS looked pretty smart on my dash board, but the lady
inside that gadget was the most annoying, rudest person I have run into in
a long time. Every 10 minutes, she would sarcastically say,
"Re-calc-u-lating." You would think that she could be nicer. It was like
she could barely tolerate me. She would let go with a deep sigh and then
tell me to make a U-turn at the next light. Then if I made a right turn
instead. Well, it was not a good relationship...
When I get really lost now, I call my wife and tell her the name of
the cross streets and while she is starting to develop the same tone as
Gypsy, the GPS lady, at least she loves me.
To be perfectly frank, I am still trying to learn how to use the
cordless phones in our house. We have had them for several years now, but I still
haven't figured out how I lose three phones all at once and have to run
around digging under chair cushions, checking bathrooms, and the dirty
laundry baskets when the phone rings.
The world is just getting too complex for me. They even mess me up
every time I go to the grocery store. You would think they could settle
on something themselves but this sudden "Paper or Plastic?" every time I
check out just knocks me for a loop. I bought some of those cloth
reusable bags to avoid looking confused, but I never remember to take
them with me.
Now I toss it back to them. When they ask me, "Paper or plastic?" I
just say, "Doesn't matter to me. I am bi-sacksual." Then it's their turn
to stare at me with a blank look. I was recently asked if I tweet. I
answered, No, but I do fart a lot."
emoBigsmile emoGeezer Jmax
Jmax
