Needed a good laugh, thought I would share this one.

[Jmax]

SUBJECT: The Last Kiss

Back on January 9th, a group of Pekin, Illinois bikers were riding west on I-74 when they saw a girl about to jump off the Murray Baker Bridge. So they stopped.
George, their leader, a big burly man of 53, got off his Harley, walked through a group of gawkers, past the State Trooper who was trying to talk her down off the railing, and asked,

"Hey Baby, whatcha doin' up there on that railin'?"

The jumper said tearfully, "I'm going to commit suicide."

While he didn't want to appear ‘sensitive’, George also didn't want to miss this ‘be-a-legend’ opportunity either. So, he asked, "Well, before you jump, Honey-Babe, why don't you give ole George here your best last kiss?"

So, with no hesitation at all, she leaned back over the railing and did just that. It was a long, deep, lingering kiss followed immediately by another even better one.

After they breathlessly finished, George got a big thumbs-up approval from his biker-buddies, the onlookers, and even the State Trooper.
George then said to the jumper, "Wow! That was the best kiss I have ever had, Honey! That's a real talent you're wasting, Sugar Shorts. You could be famous if you rode with me. Why the hell are you committing suicide?"

"My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl."

It's still unclear whether she jumped or was pushed!

 

[Hook1]

Oh you are board aren't you? You need to hunt or fish soon or the withdrawals will just be too much.

 

[Jmax]

Hook1 - 8/24/2013 10:46 AM

Oh you are board aren't you? You need to hunt or fish soon or the withdrawals will just be too much.

You got that right. I am ready to fish now but my foot will not let me. emoBang

If you want to feel better about yourself you only have to look at my issues lately. Seems they will not stop. I had a call yesterday evening that my son in Cookville fell out at work. They rushed him to the ER and he was told he had a kind of heat stroke. Partly for not taking good care of himself, partly from heat (they do not have air conditioning at the plant he works) and partly from not drinking enough water working a double shift in 100 degree temps. They released him later on after getting him going again with an IV, he was sent home to rest. That rattled me enough, but then last night at 12:30 my phone rang again and woke me up. emoEek This time it was my dad at the nursing home. He had been checked on, but found unresponsive. They were rushing him to the ER. The doctors do not feel he will make it through the weekend. Please pray for him to pass in peace. He has been poor for about the last year.

Add this to two boats not working, my hearing lose, lighting hitting my home knocking out my internet, phone, one of the air conditioners, a couple flood lights on the house, a tree getting hit by lighting in my yard bursting into flames,....then my accident with the mower loosing two toes, they will not stop bleeding and swelling.....I NEED SOME RELIEF!

O.K....I am done venting. You feel better about your own problems now? emoRolleyes Jmax

(You see now why I said I needed a laugh.)

 

[VolsFan24]

Sorry to hear about all that Jmax. On a good note, the joke was pretty funny

 

[decaturbullet]

Thoughts and Prayers for All Jmax!!

 

[Gator]

Jim
Sorry you're having such a streak of bad luck. We will continue to pray for you AND your son and dad. I believe if it was raining soup you'd be stuck outside with a fork!

 

[Jmax]

Thanks guys, I guess I needed to vent some. My son is better, he called us a couple times today and did not go in to work today. He loves what he does but does not know when to stop. He is a Quality Control Engineer, I think he would work 24 hours a day if he could. emoBang They are starting some kind of new production wing there and he with another guy are designing it. It caught up with him yesterday and I think that was a wake up call for him to take better care of himself. Burning the candle at both ends way too much, I think most of us can say, "Been there, done that."

One of my buddies sent the above to me to give me a laugh. It is kind of funny sick. Jmax

 

[Shark]

Jim,
Wishing you and your family the best. I would take you out fishing if I had a boat. Even if it was just to drown some minnows for crappie or any type of fishing you feel like doing to let you relax and de stress some.