EricM
Well-known member
I haven't had to write one of these essays since grade school.
Mary and I went to Hilton Head Island for a week. Beautiful place. We spent a couple of days in Savannah and a couple more in Charleston. Historic homes. Beautiful plantations and gardens. Fabulous oceanfront and river views. Unbelievable marinas. Huge live oaks covered with Spanish moss.
And CHIGGERS.
Lots and lots of chiggers. And they really, really like me. From the tops of my socks to the bottoms of my shorts, I look like someone shot a load of 12 gauge 7-1/2s at me from about 60 yards.
Not a great start, but it has to get better. I learn to scratch and drive at the same time. Forward anyhow. Seems that even being the only vehicle in the whole parking lot that one cannot scratch and back up at the same time effectively. I managed to center the rear bumper and tailgate of my used-to-be beautiful Inferno-red Ram Hemi pickup truck on a pretty significant steel light post standing all by itself in the lot. At least the truck is clean - knocked every speck of dirt and dust off of the entire truck. Got "the look" from the wife, too. Can't wait to explain this to my insurance adjuster.
Then, since all was going so well, I bit down on something and managed to break a crown off of a front tooth.
So now, touring some of the highest-class historic sites and areas, staying in a high-dollar 3 bedroom condo on Hilton Head Island and eating in fancy restaurants with a beautiful woman, is this grey-haired, fat Tennessee boy in his beat-up pickup truck with a front tooth missing and covered in chigger bites and Calamine lotion.
Not exactly the mental picture I had of myself at this stage of my life.
PS: I really hate chiggers.
Mary and I went to Hilton Head Island for a week. Beautiful place. We spent a couple of days in Savannah and a couple more in Charleston. Historic homes. Beautiful plantations and gardens. Fabulous oceanfront and river views. Unbelievable marinas. Huge live oaks covered with Spanish moss.
And CHIGGERS.
Lots and lots of chiggers. And they really, really like me. From the tops of my socks to the bottoms of my shorts, I look like someone shot a load of 12 gauge 7-1/2s at me from about 60 yards.
Not a great start, but it has to get better. I learn to scratch and drive at the same time. Forward anyhow. Seems that even being the only vehicle in the whole parking lot that one cannot scratch and back up at the same time effectively. I managed to center the rear bumper and tailgate of my used-to-be beautiful Inferno-red Ram Hemi pickup truck on a pretty significant steel light post standing all by itself in the lot. At least the truck is clean - knocked every speck of dirt and dust off of the entire truck. Got "the look" from the wife, too. Can't wait to explain this to my insurance adjuster.
Then, since all was going so well, I bit down on something and managed to break a crown off of a front tooth.
So now, touring some of the highest-class historic sites and areas, staying in a high-dollar 3 bedroom condo on Hilton Head Island and eating in fancy restaurants with a beautiful woman, is this grey-haired, fat Tennessee boy in his beat-up pickup truck with a front tooth missing and covered in chigger bites and Calamine lotion.
Not exactly the mental picture I had of myself at this stage of my life.
PS: I really hate chiggers.
